Sunday, April 15, 2012

A Song for My Mood

Music is a good gage of what I am feeling at the moment. Tonight, on my walk, I heard this song:

 

It kind of fit what I have been feeling lately. Loveless.  I am not sure what has gotten into me lately. I just feel incredibly lonely.  Maybe it is the spring air here in Boston or the fact I see people out and about holding hands or that I don’t seem to be wanted but I feel pretty hopeless in the love category. That is the one area of my life I am truly and utterly dissatisfied with.

Sometimes I think that I should have gotten married when I had the chance but then again, I would be in the same place right now either way, most likely.

I went to see Mom’s grave yesterday. My father’s parents are also at the National Cemetery in Bourne. I took Dad with me and we spent a little time at each grave. Dad’s way of grieving is different than my way so I tried to accommodate him as I best I could. I will go back again by myself so I can spend more time down there.

How was everyone’s weekend?

4 comments:

  1. I know that how hard it is to feel lonely and loveless. I've been there. I still get lonely at times.

    Sounds like you're getting out and walking, though, and that is such a good thing to do for yourself. I need to do more of that.

    One step at a time. Feeling lonely and feeling loveless--those feelings are not permanent.

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  2. Hi Jen. I'm sorry you're feeling lonely. That is a very painful experience. I'm glad you recognize that getting married when you had a chance would probably not change your situation. In fact, it might be worse, if you were in a bad marriage.

    It is so very easy to look at another couple holding hands and to think, oh they're so lucky, I wish I had that, etc. I know, because I've done that. But you know, you really don't know what their life is like when you're not looking. I knew a couple who were extremely lovey-dovey in public and you would have thought that life was bliss between them. Let's just say they are no longer together.

    Tina made an excellent point, feelings are not permanent. I know it's hard to believe that when we're in the midst of them, but it really is true.

    Um, my weekend was just ok. Actually, I've had better. I did lots of errands. I'm full of anxiety because I have a lot to do this week, and I'm putting it off. Ugh.

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  3. Song for my mood so shared on the post here. Read all about it

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  4. They look pretty cool. Thanks for sharing. Please put more pics

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