Tuesday, July 19, 2011

A Big Day for News

I heard and read something today that gave me a huge sigh of relief. Like that secret I don’t talk about so much was out in the open.  I have mentioned it a little bit here. Here and Now on NPR did a piece on How A Parents Compulsive Hoarding Impacts Children. All I could say was how true it was. How it was isolating. No one ever came over. We never had anyone over. It contributed to my whole problem of locking myself away. It was never really like the television shows.

My mother was a hoarder. Perhaps she just slipped from one mental illness into dementia. I don’t know. She had some schizophrenic tendencies and depression. None of it diagnosed until the dementia diagnosis.

I was a little older when it started. Secret Sister and my brother were the ones that bore the brunt of it. They never had Mom somewhat normal. My brother is 10 years younger than me and Mom was never the same after he was born. I had formulated my plan of escape. I was going to go far far away to college. I started to research colleges early in high school. I was ready. I may have gotten away but it was with me.

We would clean up but it was no good. It would just go back to the way it was in 2 days. Things were in definite disarray. Ultimately what stopped it was the dementia and my parents moving out of their house into a small apartment.

To this day I am worried I will become one. I look at my messy apartment and say I MUST clean up.

Today was a big news day in the mental health world on whether anti-depressants actually work and how many Americans are on them. I am on 2. The generic versions of Prozac and Wellbutrin. Do they help me?

Prozac has helped with my ruminating, I think. Wellbutrin, honestly, am I sure, not really. Do your antidepressants actually work?

6 comments:

  1. Hmmm, well if I said yes, I'd want to know what people were expecting them to 'do' in the first place. Anti-depressants don't make me feel 'better', and on their own are not much use. However, when depression has me curled in a ball under the duvet, brain stuck on suicide, anti-depressants help me get out from under there and start thinking. Not even thining straight, just thinking. Then the heavy lifting starts and all the other stuff... exercise, challenging negative thoughts etc... starts with effort and determination. That is what get's me better.

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  2. I can definitely tell a difference in my mood and thoughts when I'm not taking my Lexapro...but the side effects almost make me want to give it up. I tried Wellbutrin for a while, and I LOVED everything about it except the panic attack it gave me. My doctor pulled me off of it because of that. So...I think they help, but I don't think they're a magic cure.

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  3. I will read that article later, but the first two paragraphs seem remarkable familiar. Do antidepressants work? Well, interestingly my psychiatrist will not put me on SSRIs because of the risk of mania, but tells me I don't fit bipolar. Since then I have had an array of antidepressants which certainly didn't really work. And the one I am on now is notorious for making you wildly irritable and for me, last time I was on it, made me absolutely manic, but in a good way. So he has put me back on that again???? Yes, your guess is as good as mine. The only one I was on that gave me any longer periods of stability was Sertraline, but I saw recently that the guide lines for that is to take it for up to two months. I was on it for two years, and then on and off it for a long time. We have a similar thing going on over here, as the rate of depression has increased dramatically. From my own experience, some antidepressants can have a tendency to poop out on you, some work just fine (in my case the SSRIs that The psych won't put me on) and some obviously work for some and not for others. Some people take them to get through a difficult moment, some take them long term, like myself. To be honest, if they are doing the job then great. If not, then it is time to reconsider and hope your MHT feel the same way. I don't care what I take as long as it gives me some sort of quality of life. (I've forgotten what that is exactly, but most people say it's good ;-) ) xx P

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  4. I have been on Prozac for 4 yrs now for ruminating and it has worked tremendously! I feel like it has set me free. I still ruminate but only for short times and it doesn't take over my life anymore.

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  5. We saw some hoarding tendencies in my grandmother, but not until the Alzheimer's kicked in. And then she was still pretty good at keeping it confined to one room.

    It still scares me, though.

    As for anti-depressants, I've never personally taken them, but I've seen good friends benefit from them in short stints.

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  6. I know my antidepressants work. I take Wellbutrin, abilify, and trazodone (a little ativan to round it out). Before I upped my wellbutrin and added the abilify I was minutes from the hospital. I am way better now. But I agree with Med - they don't make me "better" really. Just managable I guess.

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