Isn’t that rat cute? I think so but that is not the point. I feel like a rat in a cage. Always looking outside but trapped.
Maybe I am just losing hope. As I get closer to 37, I fear that I wasted so much time dwelling on the past that now that I think about the future, I feel I missed much of it and that I probably won’t get it. My chance to have a family was messed up by silly mistakes I made with past boyfriends.
I am not sure what has gotten into me tonight. I went for a walk to a grocery store about 1.5 miles from my house to buy a few groceries and it felt good but when I got home I got back into that thought mode and it just brings me down.
I got an email from Dove Movement for Self Esteem today. I thought to myself wish I had a daughter to do that with but then thought that my self esteem is in the toilet today. I need fix my self esteem before I helped anyone with theirs.
I have pledged to eat unprocessed food in October at Eating Rules. I’ll write more about it tomorrow because it was a last second thing I added because I just joined off of a blog I read. You should join me.