Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Online Dating Mystifies Me

I decided to hit the grocery store tonight mainly because my apartment does not have air conditioning and it was hot. When I was driving home tonight around 83, the thermometer in my car still said 92 degrees. It wasn't too bad actually. Outside on a disaster area by the corn, Hannaford's was fairly calm tonight.


I have been looking around OkCupid and Match tonight. I've been thinking about what to do with my profile. I think I need new pictures or a new profile or something. What I have now, it not cutting it. I think I need some help in this department.


I never know what to write. Maybe I should just post them here and get some constructive criticism. I mean really. What do you think? Good idea? I could have you all help me!




Monday, August 30, 2010

Earl may be coming to visit

Dad has given me the computer he does not use to use since my computer had seen better days. I went and picked it up tonight. I tried to avoid talk of the past but inevitably talk skewed that way. Dad also asked about Secret Sister. They are still not talking but I see both of them struggling a bit.


We might have a hurricane here on Friday. Earl, the hurricane, is project to march right up the east coast and hit us on Friday. It has been a while since we have had a hurricane here. I think the last time was the day before I left to go to college for the first time. I had packed all of my important belongings in my Dad's van the day before the hurricane so we could leave quickly after the hurricane. I was nervous that a tree would fall and take out all of my belongings. That was almost 20 years ago! Time flies!


I need to go food shopping but the thought of going to the grocery stores is daunting. Even the threat of snow bring out a run on bread and milk. I am not sure what a hurricane would do. I may just have to break out the armor and brave it. 

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Broken

Dad has told me several times recently that he is “very sorry that he broke me” when I was young.  He broke my spirit. Changed me.

When I was young, I was outgoing, rebellious, independent, a bit of a leader, just a really outgoing friendly kid. I wanted to play with the kids in the neighborhood. My parents had told me not to go beyond a certain point but all of the interesting kids lived past that certain point. I went past it. Continually. I grew up in Holbrook, MA, a small town south of Boston, and we used to go all over the neighborhood we lived in and would go outside at 9 am in the summer and not come in until dinner time.

I was punished. Over and over again, I went to play with those kids and over and over again I was grounded for a week. I tend to be a bit stubborn, a definite family trait, but all I wanted to do was play with the kids. I wanted to be outside, be tom boyish and play with the kids. Dad did not like that. He broke me alright.

I went from a kid who played outside to one who really, very rarely went outside. I went from extroverted to introverted. Around the same time my body was changing, this was as well.

Dad has been saying he was proud of me at not accepting what everyone tells me. He was proud of me at being rebellious. He was proud of me at being independent. He wished he hadn’t broken me. I hadn’t really thought about that. It was not one of the things I dwelled on and I am not sure how I feel about it now. As I struggle to let that extroverted person out and get my voice out and not suppress it, I am tired of keeping that rebellious, independent, outgoing girl inside.

That girl is coming out more and more. As I become more confident, I feel more like that little girl.

I wonder what my life would have been like if I wasn’t changed. I can’t go back and change things. Lord knows I have spent far too much time dwelling on a past that I can not change. I sort of wish Dad had never talked about this because I wouldn’t be thinking about it.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

5 Things: About Me Edition

In an effort to be a bit more positive, especially on quiet weekends, I am going to start to do 5 things Saturdays. It could be random things but today is 5 things you may or may not know about me.

1.I am excited that football is back. I love football and I love the New England Patriots.  Put me in front of a TV with football on it and I will watch and get sucked in.

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2.I have always wanted to go to Bora Bora since reading Tales of the South Pacific by James Michener but I also want to go      Churchill,  Manitoba to see the polar bears and Scotland to listen to the accents.

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3.When I was a kid, I wrote stories. Notebooks and notebooks of stories. I wonder what happened to them.

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4. I had chicken vindaloo for dinner tonight. I love Indian food!

5.I have a bit of a magazine problem. Real Simple, Country Living, Shape, Women’s Health, Self, Weight Watchers, Martha Stewart, Everyday Food, Vogue Knitting, Smithsonian, Rachel Ray…. most from Diet Coke points or other free type of offers but really, I get more than I need. I need to thin out the magazines.

 

I do love Real Simple magazine and it won’t be thinned.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Sleep

I am finding out just how important sleep is in my life. Lately, I have been:

  • Sleeping through 3 alarms, even on the weekends
  • Waking up later and later for work. This morning, I woke up at 8:30. I have to be to work by 9.
  • Drinking a lot of coffee, like 4 or more cups a day
  • Having moments of extreme snippiness then crying as if I’ve been dumped. I liken it to a tired toddler.
  • I eat more.

I have come to point where I must tell my brother that I can’t pick him up any more. I have been picking him up at the train station since Dad had the stroke/aneurysm. He works 3-11 and lately, he hasn’t been getting off the train until 12:45. This means by the time I drop him off at his apartment, then get home and to bed, it is around 1:30 and falling asleep, maybe 2.

I am supposed to be up for work at 6. I can’t do it. It is affecting my life too much. I hate to do this to him. I know that I have been a bit too close and involved/wrapped up in my family. It is a problem and a major source of anxiety in my life.

My number one goal this week is to SLEEP and talk to my brother.

My number 2 goal is to journal. I need to journal again. I need to have a good ass kicking for lack of journaling.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Guess where I am going?


Downtown PittsburghImage via Wikipedia


Yep! I am going to Pittsburgh. I got an email from Jet Blue with some discount airfares and for $29, they had flights from Boston to Pittsburgh. I had been to the other $29 fare cities so I said to myself, “Why not!” I went and booked it.  I’ll be visiting September 21st – September 23rd. I am totally excited. I am going to have to see what there is to do in Pittsburgh. I am sure I will be busy.


One thing not to do in Pittsburgh is to walk around with my Patriots jersey. I will leave my Patriots stuff at home.


I have been bitten by the travel bug this year. I have been to DenverLouisville and New York City. Next year, I will be going on a cruise, possibly to Italy, maybe to Ireland with Dad and out to California to Blogher and maybe to see my friend while I am in California.  I am definitely saving my pennies!


One of the advantages of being single is that I can do this. I can book a ticket and just go. Boots will be ok for a few days.


Have you been anywhere lately? Are you planning on going anywhere?
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Monday, August 23, 2010

Angus Snack Wrap Giveaway

 

It isn’t every day that I have a give away on this blog but I do have one today. When I attended Blogher, I went to the CheeseburgHer party, which was sponsored by McDonalds. I took a quick survey about my experience. After, I found I was given 5 Free Angus Snack Wrap coupons by McDonalds to give to my readers.

I had the opportunity to try one at the party and I thought they were good. I am going to give 5 readers the opportunity to win 1 coupon. All you need to do is leave a comment on this post and I will pick 5 names to get the coupons on Friday evening.  Unfortunately, the coupons are only good in the USA.

Good Luck!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

It is Sunday night AGAIN

Once again, it is Sunday.

After a rainy day roaming SOWA market and attending the Ice Cream Showdown, yes, a showdown involving ice cream, I am home dreading the work week ahead.

Props to the Chilly Cow Purple Haze! I loved it! All the ice cream was good however.

Boots has been curled up like a cat who understands that it is Sunday night and I will disappear for a week again. At lease this week is going to be fairly quiet. No concerts, events, and the only night I have unusual plans in Friday night for a restaurant week dinner at Woodward, in the Ames Hotel. I am looking forward to that.

It is funny that for years I wished that my life was more exciting and now, I want I long to have my boring life back.  The grass is definitely greener and sometimes the loner in me just wants to come out and suppressing it is hard.

Lets hope for a family drama, emergency free week.

Friday, August 20, 2010

It's Friday night and....

I ain't got nobody..... I don't think you want to hear me sing. My exciting date tonight was dinner with Dad. We went to the Union Oyster House in South Weymouth. It was pretty good. Dad was his usual self. He told me when someone "checked me out" and how he would have gladly rooted for me if he had the chance.

Thankfully, he did not. I do not need dating advice and cheer leading from my Dad. Though with his amazing progress, he might look good dancing around with pom poms. OK, not really, but he could slowly move around with pom poms telling me all about men.

Dad is recovering very well. He has made about an 85% recovery. He is very aware of who is checking me out all the time. "That guy over there was checking you out," Good I guess.

The other night at dinner with a friend of mine, she said I was really "approachable."  I always thought I was the opposite with my gruff Boston no eye contact exterior but I was wrong. I lure people in with my story telling and perhaps my chest. Maybe just my chest. I don't know.

I am feeling a bit more confident. Enough to ask someone out? Well, probably not. How do people meet nowadays? Meddling parents? Certainly not the grocery store. I have discussed the problems I have at the grocery store before. Besides older people asking me to reach for the top shelf as I am 5'10, the only way I would get a guy is to huck a cantaloupe at them. Truthfully.

On the T? Don't get me started on talking to strange people on the subway. It goes against the grain of my being. Once in a while, generally occurring with full moons, I will talk to someone but that is because I am compelled to or they ask me because "look like I am from Boston." So, the T is probably a no. Most of the guys I see have a ring on the Red Line anyways.

Then there is OK Cupid, Match, POF, etc. I haven't spent much time on them lately but since things are slowing down, I should get back into it.

Back to Weight Watchers in the morning. I have a busy day planned. Bloodymarypallooza, Piece of Pie Contest, see Mom before all of this.

I am feeling better. Situational depression gripped me. Maybe it was a coping mechanism. Maybe not. I don't know. I don't like it.

My company is still alive but just barely.

Black font is easy to read so I am making the change.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Ray and David in Concert

My computer is about 90 in human years. It is on its last legs and may or may not last very long. It has been giving me a little bit of a problem tonight and other then going Office Space on it, which would be gratifying, it is my only blogging option at the moment that I can post a picture or two. So, this post will be quick while it cooperates with me.  I swear it plots against me to act up when I need to use it most.

I went to the Bank of America pavilion in Boston last night to see Ray LaMontagne and David Gray in concert. It was a nice night for a concert and our seats were on the edge of the pavilion so we also had some air during the show. We were running a little late but we got there just in time as Ray was just starting.

Ray was awesome. I loved his music live. He played Beg, Borrow or Steal and all of this other old and new songs. He has such a good voice and is comfortable singing and is not as pretentious as David Gray is. I love you David but you have an air about you. Secret Sister had never heard Ray’s music has become a new fan. I love the blues feeling it has and that fact that I can relate to a lot of the songs.

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David played one of my favorite songs in the beginning of the concert. I love Sail Away. Some days, it is all I want to do. I wanted to hear a few other songs like Say Hello Wave Goodbye but we did not stay until the end. I have seen him about 7 times in concert and I was exhausted. We called it a night a little early. Yes, I was a fuddy-dud.

All of the pictures I took of David’s show came out wicked dark. I need to learn to use my camera better.

Music is a great calming agent. It calmed my Mother down when she was anxious and I can feel its calming effects on me when I am going through some issues. It was really calming me last night. It was exactly what my doctor would have ordered had she known. I was waving my arms, singing, laughing with my sister and having a good time.

Monday, August 16, 2010

A Day to Myself

I took today off from work just because. I needed a mental health day and isn’t that what vacation and personal days are for, anyways? I did not have a plan for today and that was fine by me. I slept in until the late hour of 11 am.  I didn’t do much. I weaved in some ends on a finished entrelac scarf, read the Sunday paper, watched some awful Real Housewives of Washington DC then went to the gym. It was a good and quiet day.

My mood was pretty good. I didn’t feel happy or sad, just kind of there. It was the first day in a while where I had nothing planned. I like that.

This week is going to be busy. Tomorrow night, I am going to see Ray LaMontagne and David Gray at the Bank of America Pavilion.  Then Wednesday, I am going with a few friends to enjoy one of Boston’s restaurants during Restaurant Week. Thursday is trivia as usual. A slow day was needed.

I have yet another finished knitting project to show. This has been done for months but I just weaved in the yarn ends so I could post pictures. It is an entrelac scarf using Noro Silk Garden yarn. I am not the biggest fan of the yarn but I loved knitting entrelac, it was so easy.

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Back to work tomorrow. I am really looking forward to the concert. I can’t wait. I am loving Ray’s Beg, Borrow or Steal song and this will be my 7th time seeing David Gray.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Finally

Weekends usually make me feel better. I spend all week dreaming about the weekend and when they come, they are gone in a second. This weekend was the first weekend in a while where I didn’t feel rushed or overwhelmed. I took a deep breath and sighed a sigh of relief.

Yesterday was the Fiber Revival in Newbury, MA. I had signed up for a Learn to Use the Drop Spindle class and I was fairly excited about it. I went to the festival with a friend and it was a gorgeous day for the festival.

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I look at this picture and love the colors of the yarn in the tent! The tent was that of Sereknity and her yarn and fiber was gorgeous! Of course, I bought some. I did buy a lot of yarn. Yes, I have a problem.

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Of course, the Fiber Revival was held on an historic farm where there were animals. This turkey was stalking the Yarn and Fiber Company’s tent all day long.

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There were alpacas, from which my favorite yarn comes from. They were quite feisty to photograph. I would move towards them to take their picture and they would move away. I would follow and they would move away again.  This continued for a few minutes.

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Isn’t this face cute?

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They had a goat. He or she was feasting on some grass.

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The sheep were taking advantage of the what shade there was.

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There was a fine looking horse as well.

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Maybe it is genetic memory that I love farm animals so much. Being a city gal, I don’t get out to the farm often and when I do, the camera comes out.

Is it bad that I was tempted to get one of these for myself?

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Of course there was spinning and knitting.

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After the festival, we went to get something to eat and when I left, I saw these ducklings on a rock.

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I am a sucker for cute animals.

I finally have a finished project to show you. It has been done for a couple of weeks but I did not weave in the ends until today.

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This is an up close shot of the cabling stitch pattern. I love the colors and this scarf will go very nicely with my coloring. Unfortunately today, it would not have shown very well with the shirt I had on.

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Last night, I had to perform disaster recovery testing for work at 2 am. With some problems, it did not get completed until 4 am and again threw my sleep off a bit. I did sleep until almost noon today and I have tomorrow off so I don’t have to be up at the break of dawn.

I went to see Mom today, for the first time in a few weeks. She was fidgety and kept moving between rooms. One thing that made me a bit sad, she thought one of the fellow patients was her father. He was tattooed and looked Italian but I don’t believe from the pictures I saw of my grandfather that he was like him. He died when I was about 2 years old. Mom was not happy when I made her leave the man.

I find it hard to believe that the summer is almost over. What happened to it? I want a do-over!

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Blogher Part 2: My Favorites

Saturday was much better than Friday. I actually attended 2.5 sessions. The morning photography one was way over my ability so I did not stay for all of it. I need to figure out my camera and spend some time on it first. As you may have read before, I have a bit of a problem remembering to take pictures and when I do, they don’t come out right at all.

The second session I attended was for fitness bloggers. My blog, while more of a life blog, does cover fitness, physical and mental. I thought that maybe I would fit in there.  I learned a few things. It was mainly a question and answer session and I listened to all of the questions and answers.

The last session of the day was by far my favorite. I went to the small blog in a big sea session and it was great. My blog will never have thousand of followers nor will I live off it and I don’t really want that. Who would sponsor a blog about my struggles with depression and would I want the companies who would sponsor that type of blog to sponsor me? I do get a bit jealous of the successful bloggers with hundreds and/or thousands of followers and get lots of comments every day but then I think of why I started this blog in the first place. It is my sounding board. My outlet. A form of therapy really. That is the way I like it for now.

The parties on Saturday night were fun. The first party that I went to, the Bloggy State of Mind party, had these cool break dancers and it was just fun to watch.

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The second party we went to, Sparklecorn, had this castle and unicorn cake. It was cool!

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By the third party, CheeseburgHer, I was fairly drunk and picture taken was non-existent. But, there was a photo booth and it called to us.

The night ended with a drink and meeting up with goober, who said he would be right back but never came back. Jerk. So not worth it.

Some favorite from the conference:

The Pink Twitter – some sort of mojito like , lemonade vodka drink. I liked it and it beats paying $10 for a Corona at the hotel.

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Meeting new friends – I was bit concerned that I wasn’t going to click with anyone . I had introduced myself to so many people and every one was nice but it mostly was passing introduction, here’s a card, nice to meet you kind of way. If I had not had drink in the bar on Friday night, I would not have met the two lovely ladies, Laura and Jenn.

Little blogs: I realized that there were other bloggers that felt like me. It kind of made my whole conference. I left that session feeling happy and better about my little blog.

I am happy I went to Blogher and I’ll be going to Blogher ‘11 in San Diego next year.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

I hate the scale

I hate the total control it has over me. I hate how it can drag me down with in seconds. I had an appointment with my nutritionist tonight and when I stepped on the scale, my heart went into my stomach. From my last Weight Watchers weigh in at 261.2 to 268.2 today. Almost 8 pounds! 8 pounds! I was thinking maybe a pound or 2 but 8? Ugh.

I cried. I guess I have been big bundle of nerves lately and that number just put me over the top. My nutritionist has read my blog (Hi) and we talked about some of the things I have written about my past and why I gained weight. That also made me cry. It is just like someone turned the faucet on and then had problems getting it off.  I felt bad because my nutritionist is not my therapist and I hated to start to cry and go on about that stuff but she wanted to know the whys of my weight gain.

To top it off, I have been feeling so blah about myself. I look in the mirror and I see ugliness. I thought I had really tackled these thoughts of self-hatred but they have been lurking in the shadows. How could someone love someone as ugly as me? I know it is not true but really, when I look in the mirror that little devil on my shoulder is calling myself names.

I have decided that by Blogher 11 in San Diego next August, I will lose 50 pounds. I need to work on getting that devil off of my shoulder and out of the shadows. I will not let that part of me ruin it.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

The Past Today

I interrupt my Blogher recap because I must comment on this story. If you recall my post, The Past, I told about how my early puberty affected the rest of my life. On my ride home from work yesterday, I heard NPR's All Things Considered Puberty Comes Earlier for Today's Girls. It totally set my mind ablaze. It was all I could think about as I sat in the tunnel and on the Expressway.

I am happy to see this discussed. I also saw it in the Metro newspaper this morning. I was one of those freaks in grade school who was much taller then the boys, who was wearing a bra in the second grade, got my period at age 8, etc. It sucked, big time. It was freaky back then because no one cared or noticed. The doctors said nothing, that I am aware of. My Mother commented to her friends about my bra size. The boys, well as I have said, would not leave me alone.

I was happy to hear that it is being addressed. How it is discussed in schools and not swept under the carpet as it was almost 30 (UGH!) years ago. If it can help a girl avoid what I went through and the subsequent problems it caused in my life, it makes me happy.

I could not wait to talk about this. I heard the report and it totally brought up the past. It also gave me hope for the future of today's girls.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Blogher Part 1

I had a great time at Blogher. I arrived in New York after a fairly quick bus ride from Boston on Thursday. The first night I stayed in The Four Points by Sheraton near the Port Authority and that was a cute, comfortable hotel. My room was small but the bed was awesome. It was really comfortable. I wish I had stayed there all weekend.

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I had thrown my stuff on the bed already before I remembered to take the picture. That bed was wicked soft! I love soft beds.

 

 

 

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Even the bathroom was cute. The towels were soft and there was pressure in the shower. A big plus in my book!

 

 

 

That night, I went to an event put on by Kaspersky Labs on Internet Security with the release of the updated version of their security software. I learned quite a bit and will be doing a separate post about what I learned there.

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On Friday morning, I transferred over to the Hilton. Now, I am not one normally to complain much but I was a little upset at the whole check in process at the Hilton. I knew I was definitely not getting into my room in the morning but I was told 1:00 pm by the clerk at the desk. I had made my plans for the day based on 1 pm. It rolled around and I was told that no, sorry, it is now 3 pm. I was not happy. I had lots of bags I was carrying around. I was tired and irritable. Luckily, I got into my room on the 12th floor at 3 pm because if I hadn’t, I am not sure what might have ensued.

I enjoyed the Newbie breakfast. I was a bit overwhelmed at the thought of me only knowing a few people at the conference and when I got to the breakfast, I sat at a table with friendly people and was put at ease. Tropicana stuff was all over the table. I love how the squeeze oranges looked in the bowl.

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I didn’t do much else on Friday during the day because of the room debacle that I was exhausted and before I knew it it was time to go to the Aiming Low EzPz party held at the Robert Restaurant.

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This is the dress I choose to wear on Friday night. It was supper comfortable if not a little revealing. I gave up on trying to keep from showing my bra in the front. It was a losing battle.

 

 

 

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I loved the view from the Robert Restaurant. It was gorgeous with the sun setting.

 

 

 

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Here is the view facing Central Park. I love the tall buildings on the other side of the park. I really am an urban girl at heart. I don’t think I could live that far away from a city.

 

 

 

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The party was hopping. I went alone and while I did feel a bit awkward, I met a bunch of people and had a great time. It pays to take a chance and go alone sometimes.

 

 

 

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After the party, I did not want to go back to my room alone so I stopping in for a drink at the hotel bar, Bridges. I am glad I did. I met some great women that I would not have met had I not gone for that drink.  I was worried that I would not “click” with people while I was there and I was wrong!

I also sort of met a fellow Bostonian in the elevator earlier and I should have known better. When will I stop falling for good eyes, smooth talking and good looks? He was also at the bar and supposedly is an attorney in Lowell, which I don’t get to very often so the odds of running into him again are next to none. I flirted with him and stuff but hotel flings do not last. When will I learn? He was handsome, if a goober.  More on the goober in Part 2.

Blogher was definitely what I made of it.

 

 

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Back Home

Blogher was fun but I was brought back to reality last night and this morning that brought me crashing down. My brother had gotten in touch with me on Saturday afternoon and told me some stuff that really worried and upset me. He told me that Dad and Secret Sister had been fighting. He wanted to know when I would be home and that things did not go well getting the apartment set up for Dad’s return.

Secret Sister left me a message last night and I did not get the message until it was too late to return the call.  I woke up and returned a call to Secret Sister.  She was crying and she had been crying. Dad had told her he wanted to disown her and that he hated her. It broke my heart. I was crying in my room.

I go away for 3 days and when I return things are falling apart. Maybe if I hadn’t gone, it would not have happened. I am upset that it has come to this. I do not want my family broken apart. Relations with my other Sister were rocky and have slowly gotten back and now this. We do not have a large family and no extended family. Can’t we all just get along?

Dad called me two times on the bus and just further worried me. I had not eaten and I had a killer headache on the ride home. I took the Red Line home and Secret Sister picked me up. We went to get some food and talked about the whole thing. She cried some more and I took it all in. I could feel myself closing up. Getting quiet. Getting down.

I called Dad tonight and that did not make me feel better. He was not in better spirits and was raising his voice with me. I responded in kind. I had said that we all need to treat each other better. He was not buying it. I guess I will have to get over to his place tomorrow after work. Hopefully, he will not treat me that way.

I am happy to be home. Boots was excited to see me and after all this, I was excited to see my cat. I will be happy to sleep in my bed tonight. I’ll do a Blogher recap post tomorrow with pictures. I actually took a few.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

A Day for Frozen Freddie’s

I was driving home from visiting Dad with AC/DC blaring on the radio when I thought that tonight would be a good night for Frozen Freddie’s. I am officially on vacation. It’s been a long couple of weeks and the chocolate peanut butter cup frozen yogurt was calling my name.

Frozen Freddie’s is this small seasonal ice cream shop on Washington Street in Quincy. There really isn’t any room to sit down and eat but the ice cream is good and the service is nice.

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I usually get my ice cream with jimmies. If you don’t know what jimmies are, they are what sprinkles are called here in Boston. Chocolate jimmies are the best.

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I decided to save the ice cream for after I had some dinner, which would only be a Morning Star Farms Spicy Black Bean Burger.  I just haven’t been hungry for dinner lately. Maybe it is the hot weather, maybe it is the Topamax or a combination of both.  It is better then eating everything in sight so I’ll take it. My appetite has definitely been affected by Topamax.  I am not snacking as much between meals.

Well, my bus leaves at 8 am tomorrow. I should go and get some rest. I will probably not blog from Blogher but we’ll see. I did not bring my work laptop home but maybe I will find a way.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Identity Crisis

Lately, in various conversations, I have mentioned the blog. Inevitably, I get asked “What do you blog about?” I’ve been thinking about this because I am sure I will be asked this at Blogher this weekend. Am I a mental health blogger? A depression blogger? A health blogger? A life blogger? A messed up blogger? A blogger?

I am sometimes afraid if I say I blog about my struggles with depression or that I am a mental health blogger that people will judge me or be turned off. Silly, because honestly, let them judge me. I don’t care.  So I usually just say about my crazy life or something like that.  I am a life, mental health and health blogger.

Speaking of Blogher, I can’t wait to get away! I am overwhelmed with the parties, information session, everything but totally excited. It will definitely be an experience. If you are going too, say hello!

Dad is being released on Saturday. Since I won’t be in town to get him, Secret Sister will bring him home.  I bought a few grab bars, a bath seat and a hand held shower head tonight for him. He should be all set with the apartment being ok for him. He is doing quite well on his own.  He was flirting with the ladies in the nursing home when I have visited the last few times!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Sunday Ramblings

We did manage to get my Mom’s bureau to my apartment without much of a problem. Getting the van from U-haul was problem-free. The only small problem was that the mirror that goes with the bureau did not fit into the van so I have to figure out another to get the mirror to my place. I’ll have to find someone with a pickup truck. I put most of the clothing that was piled in my room, in the bureau so it look a little neater as a whole in my room.

I did feel like going out to Abby Park’s 1st Anniversary Party tonight. I went with Secret Sister to the party and the afternoon started out great. We stayed at the party for a little while then went to eat at Cagney’s, which is a cool bar on Washington Street. The food is cheap and good. I made the mistake of saying something negative against the almighty Red Sox and that set her off. She demanded we leave then she proceeded to chew me out and spew negativity at me calling me negative and how I would not say anything negative about the Red Sox to anyone else in the bar because I’d get my ass kicked, she said. I laughed and said, “Sure I would.” Has she not been around at other times?

Any ways by the time I dropped her off, I was swearing (which is something I don’t do a lot of), she was swearing, calling me all sorts of names and I responded by saying that she could stop tagging along with me and other silly I’m never going to  {insert insult} comments. Let’s just say, she slammed the door and tried to get out of the car when it was moving. It always seems to end with an argument and of course, it will be my fault because it is never Secret Sister’s fault. Does anyone fight with their sibling like this? Often?

I looked at some photographs we got from Mom’s drawers and said to myself yet again that I was not fat nor was I ugly when I was a kid. I wish I didn’t listen to the name calling. I hate dwelling on the past. Looking at photos, which I like to do, dredges it up.

All of this has given me a headache. At least this week is a short work week. Hopefully, Wednesday at 5 will come fast.